Monday, June 27, 2016

Love Triumphs Over All, Including Storms and Forgetfulness

"Things need not have happened to be true. Tales and dreams are the shadow-truths that will endure when mere facts are dust and ashes, and forgot." - Morpheus, Sandman
I saved the freaking out for the stage.
Photo by KWN Design
The beginning of April was uneventful, which gave me to time to focus on producing my next Tuesday Tease and get a handle on the effects of my medication.  I've struggled with anxiety for a while but only started pharmacological treatment recently.  The meds caused drowsiness and disrupted my sleep patterns, making me sluggish and scatterbrained.  I had one of those weeks where I just kept forgetting things, and unfortunately that happened with the week of my two shows at Tuesday Tease and Glitterbomb.

I'm sure stress was a factor, particularly with Tuesday Tease.  Lillith was more hands-off this time, but I knew that going in.  The theme was comic books, and everything ready to go a week ahead.  Then scheduling conflicts popped up.  I learned my lesson with Dawn of the Nerd and immediately started contacting back-ups.  I also ran through "Black Glasses" in case I needed to step in last minute.  It turned out I did.

Since I had made Plans B, C, and D, I wasn't too worried the day of the show.  However, a severe thunderstorm that could potentially develop into a tornado decided to hit.  I kept my eyes on the weather report, and the cast decided that the show must go on.  Every member of the cast and crew (including our photographers) deserve so much props for making it out.  I also have to commend the small but dedicated crowd of Tease fans and comic book geeks (as well as some newbies).  It was fun to meet people who hadn't seen "Black Glasses", and I don't think anybody cared that I forgot my Hulk shorts.

Cast and crew of Tuesday Tease: Queer-oes!
Photo by Brandy Lynne Photography
The same week, I was to perform at a special Glitterbomb show that also doubled as the wedding ceremony for my Academy of Queerlesque classmate Cheyenne and her partner Nephenee.  Our mutual friend Melanie was kind enough to give me a ride, allowing me to do the show and attend the wedding.  However, I managed to forget part of my costume again.  I felt really bad for missing part of the ceremony to search.  At the same time, I wanted to pull off a good performance, and I needed to be ready.  It turned out that I had forgotten to transfer the things to another bag because they were in a separate bag (I put shoes in a plastic bag so they don't get my luggage and clothes dirty).

Despite that stressful moment, I was very moved by the words exchanged between the brides, and that helped clear my mind.  I improvised the missing bits and used this as an opportunity to see how I could work the crowd without relying on anything but my body.  The Glitterbomb audience loved my "Ring Ring Ring" act, and I was honored to be a part of this special show, especially after learning that Cheyenne had introduced her wife to this blog.  It's great to have people champion your work because while I've learned at a young age to rely on myself, supporters give you that extra push to try even harder and go that extra mile.  I hope Nephenee and Cheyenne are doing well in Canada!

I'm happy to say I haven't been as forgetful as I was that week… at least with burlesque (I still sometimes have to go back to lab to put something up).  Both shows reminded me that even if I primarily dance for myself, I do have an audience to entertain.  On the flipside, that also means I have supporters.  They may not come to every one of my performances or be very vocal on-line, but they are there.  So thank you all for taking the time to watch me, follow me, and read my writing!

For those of you who are available, Tony Fo-Hawk is performing at tomorrow's Tuesday Tease.

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