Saying Goodbye to the Sweetest Lady

As I said on Facebook when I heard the news, I’m tired of making these tribute posts.  However, we’re all mortal, and once again, I’m reminded that we can all leave this realm at any time. A little over a month ago, I discovered that artist Theresa Mangum, who had performed burlesque as Sweet T, suddenly passed away.

I met Sweet T when I had begun to dip my toe into the world of burlesque.  She often worked the front desk of the Ruby Room, and I remember getting tips on where to find fishnet stockings as I started kittening.  Her partner Jes taught me how to sell merch during my first gig at the 2013 Dallas Burlesque Festival.  Although more people now know about the issues with Ruby Revue, I was pretty ignorant back then and once awkwardly asked T about whether she would be at a show.  She was very polite, and true to her name, her sweetness was known throughout the community.  In fact, she was voted “Sweetest Lady of Burlesque” in multiple Dallas Burlesque Festivals.

I had the pleasure of sharing the stage with
Sweet T at the 2014 Dallas Burlesque Festival.
Photo by Karlo X Ramos

 

On-stage, T was known for her graceful performances and flexibility.  It translated from classic burlesque to rock ‘n’ roll (and go-go dancing) to even a bit of nerdlesque.  One of my favorite acts of her was a Big Eyes-inspired number for Burton Burlesque, as we got to the artist come out too.   I took a few flexibility classes with her too, and I always appreciated how she made it accessible for everyone.

Although more recent years saw T focus on her visual art career, she always maintained connections with the Dallas burlesque scene.  I wasn’t too close with her, but I saw that she was friends with many of my fellow performers and I enjoyed following her social media posts about assorted art projects.  She was such a talented individual, and the Dallas creative world will deeply miss her.

If you would like to help Jes with end-of-life costs, please check out this GoFundMe.

Upcoming shows: 10th Annual Dallas Burlesque Festival

I can't believe it's time for DBF again!  I'm mega stoked that Tony Fo-Hawk and I are both performing in the festival, which is celebrating its 10th anniversary.

First I’m doing “Moonlight Serenade” at the Opening Night Party on February 15 at 8:30 PM at the Belmont Hotel.  Show is free!

Then Tony Fo-Hawk is rocking out at the Friday night early show at 8 PM at the House of Blues Cambridge Room.  The link directs you to tickets.

Dallas Burlesque Festival '15

Things have gotten busy again.  Even though I swore off new routines, inspiration and opportunity came together to create a perfect storm.  I couldn't pass off the opportunity to perform in Panty Raid's Disney-themed show this Friday, Bare Necessities.  Please come out if you're in the neighborhood.

Now, let's travel back to a couple weeks ago when I was just coming off a pulled back muscle and eager to help out at the Dallas Burlesque Festival.  Since lab work has gotten hectic as of late, I decided not to take Friday off and instead enjoyed the second show as an audience member.  I was sad to have missed the first one, but the day job comes first.

Even though Dallas Burlesque Alliance Showcase contained a lot of familiar faces, there were several acts I had never seen before.  I felt really lucky to be in a city full of talented performers, and it made me want to work harder so that I could represent Dallas well too.  I was stoked for my fellow Dallas School of Burlesque CATS for not only opening the show, but also going home with the Class Act award.  Unfortunately I couldn't stay long to party since The Companion had come after work to pick me up.

Saturday morning, I got up early to go to the Ruby Room for Ginger Valentine's workshop.  It was fun to learn a new routine for Valentine's Day even if I couldn't show it off until a later date.  I still had some time to chill at home so I watched a film about freeskiiers Sarah Burke and Rory Bush.  As with all things action sports, it inspired me to take on any challenges thrown at me.  It was probably a good thing that I had some adrenaline pumping since we pick-ups artists had some heavy lifting to do. 

The show went really smoothly, much of that thanks to great camaraderie with my fellow kittens and the stage manager Jess for being on top of everything.  She was amazing.  I also have to give a shout-out to May May and Mr. Mariah for providing some extra muscle for Elle Dorado's "ice".  Never did I think I would be putting together a synthetic figure skating rink.  Having been a fan of figure skating since I was a little girl, I was stoked to see her live.

There were so many amazing acts.  I liked seeing the different dance and performance styles, ranging from Shelbelle Shamrock's breakdancing to Grace Gotham's samba to Angi B. Lovely and Stormy Gayle's circus arts.  Kitten N' Lou had me silently cracking up.  I also had the honor of helping escort the legendary Tammi True on-stage for her to wow the crowd. My favorite moment was not a performance, however, was Penny Ruffles' surprise proposal.  Those of us backstage didn't get to see it, but we all got excited when El Vez said, "Little black box".  Backstage was overflowing with happy emotions.  Many congratulations to Penny and her man!

Saturday Showcase Pick-Up Artists:
Helena Isis, me, Classi Chassi, and Penny Ruffles

The after-party featured a lot of cool tunes from Trigger Mortis, and I couldn't help but join in on the dancing for a bit.  I was getting tired though so after chatting for a bit, I headed home.  I was still worn out on Sunday, and due to having lots of errands, I wound up missing the guest workshops.  Hopefully there will be another chance to take them.  Another excellent Dallas Burlesque Festival was in the bag, and I felt reinvigorated by all the inspiring performances.

Dallas Burlesque Festival '14 Night 3

The big DBF show was Saturday night, but I was already busy during the day.  The Ruby Room hosted workshop from some of the festival's performers.  Unfortunately, being car-less in a city with less than ideal public transport options and a stage kitten for that night, I could only pick one to attend.  I chose Gloves & Stockings, Basics and Beyond! with Midnite Martini.  Paco Fish's mention of her in his essay, "On Innovation and Creativity", had sparked my interest, which was further bolstered by the videos I found on-line.  Plus I was already thinking of ways to switch up my stocking (or sock) removals.

Photo by Renee Holiday
http://instagram.com/reneeholiday1

I have to admit that I was a little intimidated by Midnite Martini's bold personality because I'm the exact opposite.  Maybe that was what I needed to start experimenting a bit more.  The class was super fun, and everybody had a good laugh over the ideas generated.  I think I was a bit hungry at one point because I started listing food-related items.  After the brainstorming session, we played around with removing gloves and stockings in unusual ways.  Midnite encouraged us to just go for the wildest idea even if it didn't work out.  At one point, I focused on taking a stocking off with my other foot while stretching my legs into a split, no awareness of the rest of my body.  The casual vibe I unconsciously gave off worked, and everybody loved it.  I'm such an overthinker that this little bit of positive feedback was refreshing.

I got home in time to pack my things, put in my contacts, and make a sandwich to go.  This weekend has tested my on-the-bus make-up application skills, which have been steadily improving in the past year.  When I got to the House of Blues' main stage, I was caught off guard by how big it was from a performer's point of view.  The task of being in the right place was daunting, but with four of us working backstage, I think everybody got the help they needed.

Before the show, I took the time to introduce myself to Calamity Chang.  She's a dancer I will unapologetically fangirl over because she was the first Asian burlesque dancer I found on-line (incidentally it was a picture of the last time she was at DBF). Seeing her picture got the gears turning in my head about possibly doing burlesque, and her Asiance article about navigating body image and sexuality as a well-endowed Asian girl was something I could relate to and inspired me to start looking at myself differently.  I also told her how much I loved her signature RED Burlesque lipstick especially since I've struggled to find the perfect red to work with my skintone.

me and Calamity Chang - Taiwan represent!

All of the performers throughout the weekend have been spectacular, and I feel like every time I kitten, I experience something new.  I got to see Eva Strangelove and Justin F. Credible's bullwhip tango act up close in the wings, and it was both exciting and a little scary.  Of course, it was an honor— and a riot—to be backstage with Dallas' legendary Tammi True.  She has not lost a bit of that sassiness.  Unfortunately I didn't get to talk to our special guest, Claire Sinclair, beyond checking up on what she needed, but we did bump butts and dance during one of the musical numbers backstage.  Despite the hectic rush, there was still fun to be had behind the curtain.

with my fellow stage kitten Penny Ruffles

The Companion had come to the show directly after a video game tournament so he dozed off somewhere in the after-party while I tried to mingle.  We discovered that Pelvis Costello knew what Project M was (a Smash Brothers mod and what The Companion was playing), which made  both of us happy.  Because I know what it's like to feel out of place in a crowd, I’m always overly conscious of accidentally ditching my date and boring him.  At a certain point, MayMay and I tried to find people to get food, but it wasn't until last call that we officially decided to head out.  That led to a hilarious attempt at finding the parking lot (drunk people + tired Companion + directionally challenged Hana = no idea where's the exit).  Thankfully Donna Denise led us out, and after divvying the passengers up, we invaded a taqueria that Femme Vivre LaRouge and Dr. Q recommended with in all our glittery glory.  It was late so once everybody was done eating, we decided to call it a night.

My Dallas Burlesque Festival experience was one of the best weekend of my life.  I made my solo debut and had a blast kittening the other nights and hanging out with fellow performers.  Even though I know that burlesque, like everything else in life, is not all sunshine and butterflies (despite the glitter), I rode that high for weeks afterward.  I'm proud of myself and I hope to continue to work hard for weekends like DBF.  Thank you to the producers for giving me the opportunity to strut my stuff and help out, my teachers for giving me the tools for my solo routine, and everybody who has supported me at the festival and the journey there.

Here are the previous nights' recaps: Night 1 and Night 2.
More photos can be found on my facebook page.  Many thanks to Karlo X. Ramos for getting the shots of my routine.
For those of you who didn't get to see the routine, here's the video by Michael Sauer.  It's much better live though so keep an eye out for show annoucements!

dbf14 day 1 hana li from Ruby Revue on Vimeo.

Dallas Burlesque Festival '14 Night 2

Since I knew I would getting home during the wee hours of Friday morning, I took the day off from work.  Two of my co-workers deserve mad props for coming to support me, staying for the whole show, and then going to lab meeting the next morning at 8:15 AM (in which one of them was presenting).  I've got awesome people in my lab.

I took some work home, thinking I'd get a little down time.  Needless to say, I didn't feel like doing science.  Taking it easy was probably the best choice because I had volunteered to be a stage kitten for the rest of the festival.

My fellow kitten Jessica and I went around asking the performers about props and their placement.  It seemed like an easy night because there wasn't much set-up.  However, never underestimate how hectic backstage can get once it's show time… especially when you're directionally challenged and prone to mishearing things.  On the upside, we had Pelvis Costello working as a stage hand so we didn't have to worry about lifting furniture in heels.

By Karlo X. Ramos
www.karloxramos.com

Amidst the running around, Jessica and I got roped into a little on-stage gag.  I had no idea what the game plan was and tried my best to smile my way through.  The confusion was probably written all over my face.  Everyone had a good laugh though.

There were so many amazing performances that night, and I loved getting glimpses of the audience going wild.  Of course we were all awed by Perle Noire; she brought so much intensity to every step of her routine.  I have to give Lola Martinet a shout-out for representing us Asians that night and for her ingenuity.  I also didn't get the chance to tell her how much I loved her jacket so I'm doing it here.

At the after-party, I came to the conclusion that my awkwardness is inversely proportional to how much clothes I have on.  ­­­Contrary to popular belief, a person with no qualms about nudity can still be shy.  Similarly, even though stage kittening is seen as a stepping stone to performance, it's not necessarily an easier job.  I always thought being comfortable with my body would be a more difficult task, but DBF last year was a huge step and look at how far I've come in a year.  This year, I tried to focus on trying to socialize more and actually sticking around at the after-parties (and not spend all my time with The Companion).  Overcoming that anxiety is a daunting task, but even just hanging around for a hour counts for something.  And hey, I still had a fun Valentine's Day evening despite my partner being at work.

By MayMay
www.youtube.com/user/ElFuzzyFilms

Click here for the recap of Night 1

Dallas Burlesque Festival '14 Night 1

In the days leading up to the Dallas Burlesque Festival, people would ask, "Are you excited/nervous/ready?"  I was all three at various points and sometimes all at once.  As the big day grew near, I stopped freaking out and fussing over little things (the Olympics were a nice distraction).  I realized that no matter what happened, my solo debut was something I put my heart and soul into and I would be happy with that.

By Karlo X. Ramos
www.karloxramos

When I set out to create my first routine, I wanted it to completely represent me while appealing to a broad audience.  I can get pretty niche with my interests, and I don't want to be just a nerdlesque dancer.  I knew that I wanted to use "Black Glasses" by Angela Aki because I could relate to the lyrics and there was some wordplay I could incorporate.  Also, it would be nice to introduce people to a singer they probably had never heard for (she's a bilingual J-pop musician).  Another goal of mine was to incorporate some satire or social commentary because I've always enjoyed that aspect of burlesque and it's important for me as an artist.  The song provided the opportunity to poke fun at a movie trope.  After much contemplation on the type of nerd girl to portray, I chose a comic book fan in order to fire back at people who have railed against "fake geek girls" while simultaneously conquering my fear of being perceived as one.  In short, this routine was me: Asian, nerdy, feminist, silly, and fun.  And yes, I've learned to embrace the cute too.

By Karlo X. Ramos
www.karloxramos

Thursday's show, which was made possible by both DBF and the Dallas Burlesque Alliance, comprised of all local performers with the exception of Ooops the Clown, Ratty Scurvics, and Mr. Cheeze (but Dallas embraces them as our own).  I was happy to be among many familiar faces, as well as fellow DBF newbies.  It made me feel less out of place.

My nerves returned during tech rehearsal.  Even though I had danced on the House of Blues Cambridge Room stage before, I was still overwhelmed by the bright lights and loud music.  I wound up rushing through my routine, and in my desire to not take up other people's precious rehearsal time, I skipped the series of reveals that had me concerned.  However, there wasn't much else I could do besides pay attention to mental notes and get my make-up done.

Renee Holiday gave me an applicator for my false eyelashes, and it helped me win the long, tough battle…sort of.  I didn't have time to trim my new pair so I used the crummy old ones that sit funny.  I fussed with them so much that one fell off right when Lyric Laveau and the Jazz Quartet finished.  The end of the music signaled the beginning of the dancing; fortunately I was in the middle of the setlist.

The eyelashes and my contacts behaved for the rest of the night, and watching the other performers helped me get into the zone.  Playing with Mr. Cheeze also calmed me down.  I still obsessed over details and tried to make sure the very busy kittens new where my stuff was.  I realized that I needed a way to get on-stage without ruining my first "reveal", but thankfully I was able to solve that problem.  Then Pixie O'Kneel had finished her act, and it was my turn.

Isn't Mr. Cheeze adorable?

When I got on-stage, everything became automatic.  I don't really remember much besides the bright lights and glancing down at audience members even though I told myself to look up.  I fed off their energy so the more responsive they were, the more I gave back.  It was an adrenaline rush.

The perfectionist in me would normally pick apart my performance, but I felt so amazing afterward.  I could be critical another night.  Everybody had such great things to say to me— Mary Lynn Mayhem told me to get used the compliments.  I'm definitely proud of myself, but it's hard to not say "Aw shucks" (not that I would say that, but it's that feeling).

After the show, The Companion and I wound up hanging out with my Dallas School of Burlesque classmates MayMay, Jay Scarlet, and Rowdy Rory.  We invaded the Stone Sour auction in our search for a quieter place to chat and met up with The Dirty Blonde and Dapper John.  Since everyone was hungry, we decided to go to Café Brazil— only to be reminded that it was Thursday and they were open late.  Buzzbrews, however, was open so we went there and enjoyed yummy food and hot chocolate.  It was nice way to cap off one of the best nights of my life.  

By Karlo X. Ramos
www.karloxramos

DBF14

I was going to make a post, but I wound up becoming really busy with both work and rehearsing and now it's showtime! Check out this graphic made by the Dallas Burlesque Festival. The photo is by J.D. Morgan Photography.

Upcoming shows: 2014 Dallas Burlesque Festival

Photo by Miss Missy Photography
http://www.missmissyphotography.net/

Just a reminder that I will be performing at the Dallas Burlesque Festival's Big D Burlesque Show on February 13!

The Valentine's Day show is headlined by Perle Noir is headling in the Valentine's Day show, and Claire Sinclair will be making her debut on the 15th.  Click here for all the performers and links to purchase tickets.

I did it! (blog version)

Over on my Tumblr, I made a post titled "I did it!" when I submitted the video of my routine to the Dallas Burlesque Festival.  A couple days ago, I followed it up with a second "I did it!" post upon receiving news that I was accepted.  Yes, you heard right: I am performing in the Dallas Burlesque Festival!

post-filming shot

On filming day, I was both really nervous and excited.  It wound up being a weird evening as my classmates were absent for various reasons and a fire alarm had gone off in the complex when I arrived.  While we waited for the firefighters to shut it off, I asked The Dirty Blonde about shows that I ought to submit my routine to.  After naming a couple, she brought up the Dallas Burlesque Festival.  I was hesitant because it is such a big event and I have no experience with dancing burlesque solo.  Dirty said that it couldn't hurt to apply.

After waffling on the subject (and actually being so hesitant to see myself on camera that I had to wait until my partner came home to watch the video), I eventually realized what she meant.  Yeah rejection sucks, but I face that as a writer all the time.  I didn't think I would be accepted as a stage kitten with no experience last year, but it happened because I gave it a shot.  Go big or go home, right? 

That mentality has gotten me really far with burlesque, and looking back at the past year, I am impressed with all the chances I've taken, as well as the work I've put in.  Not to say that I've always had it easy, but I do tend to pursue hobbies that I happen to be good at.  I've had to work for this; even if the dance steps were easy to learn, getting them to look effortlessly sensual took effort.  I'm proud of myself, and I've learned to not be afraid to say it.

My resolution to be more naked has been beyond successful.  It's transformed me, and I hope that burlesque continues to have that impact.  I'm super excited to see what 2014 has in store and to be in the Dallas Burlesque Festival!

Stage Kitten Initiation at the Dallas Burlesque Festival

Originally published  March 6, 2013 on Dieselpunks After Dark

Before I embarked on my mission to be naked more, I thought being a stage kitten was a possibility for me.  The outfits would be as revealing as some of the skimpy cosplays I wanted to do, and in college, I helped our theatre group keep track of where props went.  My lack of experience with heels, make-up, and generally being sexy would make the role challenging.  However, with my new resolution to get more involved in burlesque, I decided to answer the call for stage kitten applicants for the Dallas Burlesque Festival.

Bill of N Street Photography had kindly offered his services to provide photos for would-be kittens to submit, and Bella Eden helped organize the schedule and did our hair and make-up.  The majority of my experiences with modeling and acting sexy involve playing a character so I learned several things about pin-up modeling and my own sexy side:

By N Street Photography. 
MUAH: Bella Eden

1. Less is more in terms of wardrobe.  I was glad to have brought many outfits, including lingerie (that didn’t really match but looked okay together).
2. More is better in terms of make-up.  It’s especially true with eyeliner on single eyelids.
3. Being cheap doesn’t work for false eyelashes.
4. You don’t need a fancy hairstyle.  Just a flower will suffice.
5. A headshot and a full body shot don’t have to be boring.  Yes, they want to see your face and body, but you also have to let your personality shine through.

Despite loving the great photos, I didn’t have much confidence in getting the part.  The Dallas Burlesque Festival brings in a large amount of talent, and I had no experience.  You can bet that I was extremely surprised and thrilled to have been chosen.  Lesson #6: don’t doubt yourself.

That wasn’t the end of my obstacles though.  Being without a car, I didn’t have much choice but to put off shopping for the right kind of heels until the morning of my first kitten gig.  I was kicking myself for not being more of a girly girl.  We got everything in the nick of time, and there I was in the House of Blues dressing room.  I was changing next to Bettina May, talking cosplay with Black Mariah, and devouring cheese with a bunch of the girls.  Before the show began, Missy Lisa grabbed a few of us kittens to help sell merchandise.  My job had me behind the merchandise table, which was a good starting place given my anxiety with approaching people.  It was nerve-wracking to be the first person seen by incoming audience members, but I was able to switch into business mode.  The fact that I was in my underwear with fishnets and a corset barely registered in my mind.  Just as things were getting busy, Jes, the usual merch guy, appeared, and I moved onto (candy) cigarette girl duties.  I was still apprehensive about approaching people, but I was able to sell a few things and I even got my picture taken.

Lesson #7 came after the show: bring something nice to change into.  Since kittens were supposed to arrive with hair and make-up done, I came in clothes I could easily slip out of.  Needless to say, they weren’t very glamorous or even cute, but at least I had a DBF tank top, which, according to Tana the Tattooed Lady, made my boobs look great.  Lesson #8: compliments on your body can be a good thing.  When I came home, I discovered glitter on the top of my breasts.  I had no idea where it came from, but I considered it a sign that I was officially part of the burlesque world.

Sunday I felt less shy backstage.  A part of me still fangirled inside with being in the presence of Di’Lovely (the little girl in me always gets excited for Asians doing burlesque because it makes me feel like what I’m working towards is more achievable).  There was another exciting moment when legend Tammi True walked in.  While determining how much time she had to get ready, she revealed that dancers back in the golden age of burlesque would perform 15-20 minute sets.

Janie Slash, Lyric Laveau, and Carmen St. Cloud backstage

I was so nervous about missing an article of clothing or tripping on-stage, but we worked out a plan for pick up and set-up before each act to make things go smoothly.  Lesson #9: don’t panic if you stumble or can’t find something (or the stairs feel wobbly), your fellow kittens and the other dancers will help out.  Seeing performances from a kitten’s point of view was very interesting, and I’m not just talking about the side view.  Because you’re focused on what gets tossed where, you start noticing little details of the dancer’s costume and movements.

After the show, StrOker Ace gave us copies of The Berlesker, a literary journal featuring work by members of the community.  It was a reminder of how many intelligent, multi-talented individuals are involved with burlesque.  I decided that I would try to come up with something to submit for the next issue. 

me with Angi B. Lovely

My attempt to be dressier with a button-up and nice jeans still fell short of the dress code of red carpet glam.  Lesson #10: “Awards Dinner” means super fancy. . . but when you’re a chronic underdresser, a cool shirt will do.  The most important lesson perhaps is to be yourself, and that’s what burlesque celebrates in an exaggerated, sexy, glitter-filled way.  Once I stopped worrying about looking silly, I felt more comfortable chatting and snapping a few photos.  In addition to all the lessons I took home with me on the road to being a Dallas Burlesque Festival stage kitten, I now have a lot of great memories and new friends, and now more than ever, I want to increase my involvement in this wonderful community.