Upcoming shows: The G Spot and QueeranTease!!

My hiatus is about to come to an end.  First I'll be on The G Spot on Cabin Fever Live Stream.  We'll be chatting about an upcoming performance and answering any questions so please join us and ask away!  Check out the graphic below for the Twitch link or search "Cabin Fever Live Stream"

 

The show I'll be talking about is the QueeranTease!! on-line show.  The live premiere is on May 23, 8 PM Central Time.  However, your donation (for the show "ticket") will give you a link that lets you watch whenever.  To donate, send an amount of your choice ($10 suggested) to our producer with a note that it's for the show:

Venmo - Vivienne-Vermuth
PayPal - vforvermuth@gmail.com

Since I'm still working and getting my regular salary, I will be using the money I make from the show to tip my fellow performers and purchase goods and classes from them.  Similarly, my merch proceeds will go to charity to benefit organizations and individuals impacted by this pandemic so check out my Storenvy!

Keep dancing with viral challenges

Finding motivation to dance in the absence of shows and classes can be hard.  In this time of sheltering-in-place, performers and producers have found ways to provide on-line content.  Since I am still working and was on hiatus, I haven't done any of that.  However, I have wanted to utilize my time at home in some fashion that's related to drag or burlesque, as well as not sit at the computer all day.

In addition to taking classes, I started doing some challenges on-line.  Assorted athletes and dancers have done variations on the handstand, and since I have no means to do lyra or pole, I could at least work on my headstand (eventually handstand).  I haven't done too much, as I am trying to avoid injury and apartment damage, but I was able to figure out the doorway handstand.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Hana Li (@hanaliburlesque) on Mar 24, 2020 at 6:51pm PDT

Then a really fun challenge came my way.  The Asian diaspora burlesque and drag community was inspired by the #DontRushChallenge created by Toluwalase Asolo and her friends.  This required me to get into costume and make-up, something I hadn't done in a while.  However, as I was feeling disconnected from my local community, I thought this was a good way to feel like I was a part of something as a performer.  I wore my new Sean Burns tribute shirt from Props BMX as a nod to Tony Fo-Hawk who wasn't gonna be in it, and then I decided to change into Tuxedo Mask to represent nerdlesque and androgyny (plus he's an Asian character!).  The Totoro fan added more nerdiness although that wasn't originally intended.  I actually broke a wooden hand fan in a failed attempt at throwing and catching.
Viva Lamore did a wonderful job of editing 32 clips, and Filipina DJ/percussionist/vocalist Gingee provided the music.  Miss Catwings compiled all the names and links of the performers below:
Temera T'Tease
Miss Catwings
Ruby Corvette
Agent Wednesday
Joyen Santos
Misty Lotus
Viva Lamore
Kaajel Patel
Bea Lissima
Miso Honey
Diamondback Annie
Marianne Cheesecake
Black Orchid
Jaeda Mei
Juniper Lai
ChiChi Roniz
Hana Li
Alisa Evelyn
Siomai Moore
Mx Tzo
Miso Pretty
Flux Inqueerior
Minx Arcana
Lilly SnatchDragon
Elsie Marley
Jason Kwan Music
Phoenix A'Blaze
Orchid Mei
Wang Newton
Coco Ono
Bessie Snow
Calamity Chang "The Asian Sexsation"

Lastly I wanted to share an earlier on-line challenge I did when I was trying to find ways to reignite my creative spark. Snowboarder Stale Sandbech called upon his followers to create videos inspired by his innovative edit StaleLINES, which has him doing one line (the snowboarding equivalent of a section of choreography) in many locations edited to make one transformative sequence. I was super inspired by his and the filmer Spenny's creativity so I wondered if I could do a dance version. Unfortunately I didn't have a filmer following me so I did different costumes instead of locations. (Music by Marquis of Vaudeville)


It was hard to condense everything to less than a minute. On the flipside, I learned so much about transitions and creating different moods. I want to revisit this challenge again, and this quarantine provides a good opportunity...

2019 in photos

I'm using this time of shelter-in-place to catch up on blog posts although I do still have to work (just mostly at home instead of the lab).  Therefore, updates aren't going as fast as I'd like.  Nevertheless, I'm slowly reorganizing my priorities and getting back into writing and dancing.

This year I decided to stop using Tumblr.  It was a time suck, and the new censorship rules meant most performers were leaving the platform.  When I finally made the announcement, I realized I was in the middle of my year-end recap so this is the last Tumblr year-in-review you'll get: part 1 and part 2. 

Don't worry, I'll find something more suitable to replace it.  I'll make a separate post about my modeling endeavors from the past year, but you get a glimpse of some in my Instagram Best Nine (not all were taken in 2019):

I think I've covered enough of my thoughts about 2019 with my last two full-length posts, and I'll definitely share some of the happier memories in the near-future.  As Texas is still in quarantine through the middle of May, I should have the time.

Lastly, I want to announce a special livestream series Tuesday Tease is planning.  We know how our fans appreciate the sense of community and miss seeing their favorite performers, many of whom are in tight financial situations.  Therefore, we (namely Vivienne Vermuth) are bringing 2 hours of programming on our Facebook page every Tuesday starting this week.   You'll see a different side of performers as they host a workshop, give you a peak on how they get into face, or even do a long-form act.  Click here to join us every Tuesday from 7 PM to 9 PM!

Burlesque in a Time of Coronavirus

“Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under the trees on a summer's day, listening to the murmur of water, or watching the clouds float across the blue sky, is by no means waste of time.” - Baron John Lubbock, The Use of Life

This was supposed to be a post about my return to the stage after taking a couple months off, but life has a funny way of letting you know when it's NOT time.  In this case, "funny" actually means "really awful for a lot of people". I'm sure the lasting effects of these cancelled events and struggles to find substitutes will reach me eventually, but let's rewind to before all of this, when I was on hiatus.

Burlesque Bushfire Benefit cast
Photo by Moore Lightworks

Early February, I made my way to Colorado for the Dew Tour.  Although this was a dream vacation in the mountains, I contemplated performing in a new city.  In the past, out-of-town gigs helped revitalize my passion for burlesque.  The opportunity popped up in the form of Warrior Wake Productions's Burlesque Bushfire Benefit: I couldn't resist performing for a good cause.  Georgia May Wake, the producer, loved "Black Glasses", an appropriate number to make my return with, and I planned my trip with an extra day in Denver to hang with my old buddy Tristan Von and do the show.  Being in the historic D&F Clocktower and getting ready next to Midnite Martini's BHoF trophy made the experience even cooler!  Everyone in the show was super nice, and although the show was a weekday, turn-out was great.  I'm glad we could help the relief efforts in Australia.


Coming home, I felt good, but work in the lab and behind the curtain started to pile up.  I was producing more shows than before, and while I have really come to enjoy producing, the responsibilities were becoming overwhelming.  I will also confess to being envious of performers who had more stage time.  My problem was that I couldn't do more shows lest I wind up in last year's situation.

As I tried to keep going at a reasonable pace, All-con crept up on me.  Out of frustration in scrambling to prepare for a con while still doing lab work and producing, I had wished that I had contracted the novel coronavirus that was starting to spread in the U.S. in order to take a true break (since apparently my mountain vacation wasn't enough).  A half-hearted wish was spoken into fruition somewhat.  I wound up being exposed second-hand.  I hung onto to the hope of still being able to debut my new act at Glitterbomb, but the responsible thing to do was to self-quarantine for 14 days.  No con (it was cancelled after the first day), no shows, no lyra or pole dancing, no other forms of socializing.

Only fake coughing here.
"So Long and Goodnight" - Mustache Envy: Gothic Prom
Photo by Cher Musico Photography

To be honest, I'm enjoying this extended break.  The hardest part initially was trying to workout without the lure of lyra or pole and my usual work day of running between labs.  Thankfully several performers have come up with on-line classes, giving me an opportunity to learn from people I normally don't get to.  The struggle has shifted to find the same level of motivation to rehearse and refine my existing acts.  There's no future show in sight to help me focus.  I have taken the time to clean and repair costumes so that's a step forward.  Really this is a sign to to reflect on what I want out of burlesque, especially without the producer angle distracting... and maybe to stop relying on the stress of a deadline to get me creating and working. 

How will I emerge from this pandemic?  I don't know, but I'm not ready to quit... yet.  I just have to figure out how to turn these smoldering coals of desire back into flames of passion in whatever new form they may take.  It's not an easy endeavor, but it's not a bad work-from-home activity either.

Please continue supporting your favorite performers.  The links to Glitterbomb and on-line classes are just a couple of ways you can contribute.  I'm doing fine so please help my comrades who are financially struggling.

3 upcoming shows

I've got three shows in a row, which is completely bonkers.  However, this is right before I'm going on performing hiatus so gotta go big before I go out.  I might submit to one more show, but it'll be out-of-town and we'll see how I feel after this marathon.

 

No tickets necessary for Glitterbomb.  Bring some extra money for merch, as I'll be selling stuff and donating things to the Genesis Women's Shelter.  (You can also get them on-line here.) 

 

I will only be performing in the Denton stop of the Holiday at Hogwarts 2019 tour.   Show starts at 9 PM and is at Dan's Silverleaf.  Click here for tickets.

Tickets for Viva Dallas Burlesque's Festivus Follies is at this link.

Upcoming show: Asexy Tease

Tonight's show is a special one.  I used to think I was alone in being a grey-asexual burlesque performer, but now I know so many that I can do a showcase in celebration of Asexual Awareness Week. I'll definite write more about this afterwards, but if you can, please come and show your support!

My Ecdysiastic Existential Crisis

It's been a while, huh?  Until recently, I hadn't gone anywhere: I was just burning myself into a pile of ashes.  It's pretty jarring to listen to someone talking about their burn-out on NPR and recognizing their symptoms as what you feel.  The worst part was that I had no remedy until disappearing for basically two weeks on vacation.

It didn't help that I felt like I peaked
with my debut in 2014.
Photo by Cher Musico

Even if I view burlesque as a hobby, the professionalism and dedication required to be a successful burlesque performer and producer makes it another job.  Being burned-out from my primary job led to burn-out in my side hustle, and that was leading to self-sabotage.  I was failing at time management, and I could see the quality of my performances declining with the increased excuses of being "too tired" to rehearse.  It was becoming difficult to remain positive as I got rejected from gigs.  Then the cycle kept feeding into itself.

The vacation, which included a bit of unplugging, should have recharged me.  In my day job, I had resolved to draw better boundaries.  Additionally I was sleeping and eating better.  The only aspect of my life that seemed to be stuck was burlesque.  I was wondering if the burlesque world needed me—if I needed burlesque in my life.  Those two are intrinsically linked in the world of performance.  I can spend as much time as I want bumping and grinding in my living room or a studio, but there's no point to dropping a bunch of money and spending hours making a costume that no one will see.  Thus I was left with a question: what do I do?

My peers were recommending that I take a break, but it's what I had been doing since the end of July, half willingly and half unwillingly (in that I just wasn't booking gigs).  Plus I've talked about going on a break before, only to change my mind when I get an idea for an act to submit or see an opportunity I can't miss.  Continue, pause, quit— the options kept cycling through my mind until Olympic snowboarder Chloe Kim made an announcement:

I knew she had been planning a hiatus, but hearing her say it herself shed light on my situation.  A break doesn't have to be permanent, and I should have confidence in my ability to come back even if the burlesque world keeps getting more competitive.  I can continue dancing and even working on routines, but I'll step away from submitting to so many shows.  Forget this "Book one show a month goal".  2020 will be a more passive year but no less productive (I say 2020 because I already have some upcoming shows and plans to the end of 2019 and the first Tease of 2020). 

Moreover, burlesque was going take second priority in my hobbies.  I'm going to pursue more action sports, which will always be my first love despite ending up on the backburner many times. Instead of attending shows, I wanna go to more skate/BMX events, or even just stay at home to check out their debut in the Olympics.  Before my vacation, I took up skateboarding, and I've resolved to be more fearless, as I used to hold back for fear of injury. 

This break also means Tony Fo-Hawk
will be harder to pin down, but
you can't get rid of him that easily.
Photo by Tanya Forno

Boy did I eat my words.  I'm currently nursing a pulled quad from a fall that happened.  I wasn't even doing anything risky; I was merely not paying close enough attention.  Had I not been so inspired by Chloe's video and my experience in Minneapolis, where I couldn't get any burlesque gigs but had the time of my life at the X Games and entering a drag contest, I would have returned to my original dilemma.  Don't get me wrong: I have my grumpy and bummed moods at being semi-immobile.  However, I'm more determined to get back on my skateboard and focus on grinding of a different sort (okay I'm not quite there yet, but I can dream).

I've returned here only to somewhat go away for a bit in the performance-sense.  I think I might start writing more again because I won't be so worked up in trying to finish an act or prepare for a show.  So you won't be rid of Hana Li just yet.