Pride at the 2016 Texas Queerlesque Festival

"Moon Pride
I want to be your power

Tears flow down a cheek, eyes burn red
Someone cries of love violently, like a flash of lightning
Even if you're in pitch black darkness, you're not alone, you know?
The Moonlight illuminates us" - "Moon Pride" by Momoiro Clover Z

I meant to make this post a couple weeks earlier, but lab life got really hectic.  On top of that, I've been working on shows.  In fact, my next one is tonight!

I also got interviewed by Asexual Artists.  It fills me with pride to have been able to represent both the burlesque and ace communities.  Click here to read the interview.

Photo by The Naked Lens

The Asexual Artists feature provides a good segue into the topic of my next post, the inaugural Texas Queerlesque Festival.  It was place where I could show off my pride as a genderqueer, grey-asexual burlesque dancer (who also does drag but Tony was absent).  Being cognizant of my straight-passing, cisgender privilege, I initially hesitated.  I didn't want to take another, more deserving person's spot.  Then I remembered that I belonged as much as anyone else because my identity is my own and my art clearly reflects the queerness that makes up who I am.  I submitted "Moonlight Serenade" since it had queer inspirations and got in! 

"Moonlight Serenade" had been previously rejected from other festivals so I thought about what needed improvement: less focus on doing actual tango steps, more face, more sparkles!  This all sounded good, but then I changed my anxiety medication right around the festival.  I went from one set of side effects to another.  At the same time, I can't completely blame my meds for the lack of preparation.  Even with a day off from work, I was behind on costuming and incredibly scattered-brained.  You could probably tell at the shots taken during the performer portrait session.

What made me even more agitated was that I was the second performer in the line-up.  However, once The Companion delivered my forgotten items (to which I owe him greatly), I buckled down and got in the zone.  I steamed my cape, fixed my false eyelashes, put on Glam Jam (which feels good even on sunburned skin) and slipped on my ace pride socks (a special addition to my costume, inspired by the desire to show that asexuals do belong in the community) with enough down time to chat with fellow performers to wind down from all the anxiety.  Then it was showtime.

Photo by The Naked Lens

I don't know if it was the magic of my ace pride socks or the sound of fellow Sailor Moon fans screaming over the rest of the audience, but I felt a great adrenaline rush that matched my solo debut.  It was my best performance of "Moonlight Serenade" to date.  Even with a few rushed spots, I was very happy.  The cherry on top was Lady Lola LeStrange's utter excitement over the fact that I was portraying Tuxedo Mask.  Moonies unite!

The upside to being second on the first night of the festival was that I could now chill and enjoy everyone else's performances.  And boy were there a lot of awesome ones!  It made me proud to be a part of the queerlesque community and inspired to work even harder for next year.  On top of that, the people were so friendly that hands down, this is a festival I will recommend over and over again.

I was on such a high that I actually drove to Sue Ellen's by myself for Jeez Loueez's Twerk and Jerk workshop.  Driving is a great source of anxiety so this is a big deal.  It was a scary experience, but the workshop and wind-down party made me forget about it until I had to go home.  I have to mention how cool it is for Jeez to include the history of twerking in her class.  It's both necessary and fascinating.

Sunday Wind Down Party

The inaugural Texas Queerlesque Festival was amazing, and so many people worked hard to make that happen.  I thank each of them for their efforts, and I'm proud that despite its conservative image, Texas is able to have a space where queer performers from all around the country can show their art.  I came away knowing where I need to improve as both a performer and an individual, and hopefully I can come up with something worthy to be in the next show or at least find more ways to be involved‒ be it socializing, attending more workshops, or volunteering.

Dallas Burlesque Festival '15

Things have gotten busy again.  Even though I swore off new routines, inspiration and opportunity came together to create a perfect storm.  I couldn't pass off the opportunity to perform in Panty Raid's Disney-themed show this Friday, Bare Necessities.  Please come out if you're in the neighborhood.

Now, let's travel back to a couple weeks ago when I was just coming off a pulled back muscle and eager to help out at the Dallas Burlesque Festival.  Since lab work has gotten hectic as of late, I decided not to take Friday off and instead enjoyed the second show as an audience member.  I was sad to have missed the first one, but the day job comes first.

Even though Dallas Burlesque Alliance Showcase contained a lot of familiar faces, there were several acts I had never seen before.  I felt really lucky to be in a city full of talented performers, and it made me want to work harder so that I could represent Dallas well too.  I was stoked for my fellow Dallas School of Burlesque CATS for not only opening the show, but also going home with the Class Act award.  Unfortunately I couldn't stay long to party since The Companion had come after work to pick me up.

Saturday morning, I got up early to go to the Ruby Room for Ginger Valentine's workshop.  It was fun to learn a new routine for Valentine's Day even if I couldn't show it off until a later date.  I still had some time to chill at home so I watched a film about freeskiiers Sarah Burke and Rory Bush.  As with all things action sports, it inspired me to take on any challenges thrown at me.  It was probably a good thing that I had some adrenaline pumping since we pick-ups artists had some heavy lifting to do. 

The show went really smoothly, much of that thanks to great camaraderie with my fellow kittens and the stage manager Jess for being on top of everything.  She was amazing.  I also have to give a shout-out to May May and Mr. Mariah for providing some extra muscle for Elle Dorado's "ice".  Never did I think I would be putting together a synthetic figure skating rink.  Having been a fan of figure skating since I was a little girl, I was stoked to see her live.

There were so many amazing acts.  I liked seeing the different dance and performance styles, ranging from Shelbelle Shamrock's breakdancing to Grace Gotham's samba to Angi B. Lovely and Stormy Gayle's circus arts.  Kitten N' Lou had me silently cracking up.  I also had the honor of helping escort the legendary Tammi True on-stage for her to wow the crowd. My favorite moment was not a performance, however, was Penny Ruffles' surprise proposal.  Those of us backstage didn't get to see it, but we all got excited when El Vez said, "Little black box".  Backstage was overflowing with happy emotions.  Many congratulations to Penny and her man!

Saturday Showcase Pick-Up Artists:
Helena Isis, me, Classi Chassi, and Penny Ruffles

The after-party featured a lot of cool tunes from Trigger Mortis, and I couldn't help but join in on the dancing for a bit.  I was getting tired though so after chatting for a bit, I headed home.  I was still worn out on Sunday, and due to having lots of errands, I wound up missing the guest workshops.  Hopefully there will be another chance to take them.  Another excellent Dallas Burlesque Festival was in the bag, and I felt reinvigorated by all the inspiring performances.

Dallas Burlesque Festival '14 Night 3

The big DBF show was Saturday night, but I was already busy during the day.  The Ruby Room hosted workshop from some of the festival's performers.  Unfortunately, being car-less in a city with less than ideal public transport options and a stage kitten for that night, I could only pick one to attend.  I chose Gloves & Stockings, Basics and Beyond! with Midnite Martini.  Paco Fish's mention of her in his essay, "On Innovation and Creativity", had sparked my interest, which was further bolstered by the videos I found on-line.  Plus I was already thinking of ways to switch up my stocking (or sock) removals.

Photo by Renee Holiday
http://instagram.com/reneeholiday1

I have to admit that I was a little intimidated by Midnite Martini's bold personality because I'm the exact opposite.  Maybe that was what I needed to start experimenting a bit more.  The class was super fun, and everybody had a good laugh over the ideas generated.  I think I was a bit hungry at one point because I started listing food-related items.  After the brainstorming session, we played around with removing gloves and stockings in unusual ways.  Midnite encouraged us to just go for the wildest idea even if it didn't work out.  At one point, I focused on taking a stocking off with my other foot while stretching my legs into a split, no awareness of the rest of my body.  The casual vibe I unconsciously gave off worked, and everybody loved it.  I'm such an overthinker that this little bit of positive feedback was refreshing.

I got home in time to pack my things, put in my contacts, and make a sandwich to go.  This weekend has tested my on-the-bus make-up application skills, which have been steadily improving in the past year.  When I got to the House of Blues' main stage, I was caught off guard by how big it was from a performer's point of view.  The task of being in the right place was daunting, but with four of us working backstage, I think everybody got the help they needed.

Before the show, I took the time to introduce myself to Calamity Chang.  She's a dancer I will unapologetically fangirl over because she was the first Asian burlesque dancer I found on-line (incidentally it was a picture of the last time she was at DBF). Seeing her picture got the gears turning in my head about possibly doing burlesque, and her Asiance article about navigating body image and sexuality as a well-endowed Asian girl was something I could relate to and inspired me to start looking at myself differently.  I also told her how much I loved her signature RED Burlesque lipstick especially since I've struggled to find the perfect red to work with my skintone.

me and Calamity Chang - Taiwan represent!

All of the performers throughout the weekend have been spectacular, and I feel like every time I kitten, I experience something new.  I got to see Eva Strangelove and Justin F. Credible's bullwhip tango act up close in the wings, and it was both exciting and a little scary.  Of course, it was an honor— and a riot—to be backstage with Dallas' legendary Tammi True.  She has not lost a bit of that sassiness.  Unfortunately I didn't get to talk to our special guest, Claire Sinclair, beyond checking up on what she needed, but we did bump butts and dance during one of the musical numbers backstage.  Despite the hectic rush, there was still fun to be had behind the curtain.

with my fellow stage kitten Penny Ruffles

The Companion had come to the show directly after a video game tournament so he dozed off somewhere in the after-party while I tried to mingle.  We discovered that Pelvis Costello knew what Project M was (a Smash Brothers mod and what The Companion was playing), which made  both of us happy.  Because I know what it's like to feel out of place in a crowd, I’m always overly conscious of accidentally ditching my date and boring him.  At a certain point, MayMay and I tried to find people to get food, but it wasn't until last call that we officially decided to head out.  That led to a hilarious attempt at finding the parking lot (drunk people + tired Companion + directionally challenged Hana = no idea where's the exit).  Thankfully Donna Denise led us out, and after divvying the passengers up, we invaded a taqueria that Femme Vivre LaRouge and Dr. Q recommended with in all our glittery glory.  It was late so once everybody was done eating, we decided to call it a night.

My Dallas Burlesque Festival experience was one of the best weekend of my life.  I made my solo debut and had a blast kittening the other nights and hanging out with fellow performers.  Even though I know that burlesque, like everything else in life, is not all sunshine and butterflies (despite the glitter), I rode that high for weeks afterward.  I'm proud of myself and I hope to continue to work hard for weekends like DBF.  Thank you to the producers for giving me the opportunity to strut my stuff and help out, my teachers for giving me the tools for my solo routine, and everybody who has supported me at the festival and the journey there.

Here are the previous nights' recaps: Night 1 and Night 2.
More photos can be found on my facebook page.  Many thanks to Karlo X. Ramos for getting the shots of my routine.
For those of you who didn't get to see the routine, here's the video by Michael Sauer.  It's much better live though so keep an eye out for show annoucements!

dbf14 day 1 hana li from Ruby Revue on Vimeo.

Honoring Bettie and Belly Dance

I=m getting off to a great start on my resolution for 2014.  Bettie Page Reveals All made its way to Dallas, and I got to stage kitten for the mini burlesque show on opening night.  It was fun working with familiar faces.  The experience did teach me that sometimes you just have to accept things not working out.  Like my Hulk strength manifesting itself when I was struggling with the zipper on my corset.  The whole thing wound up coming right off.  Thankfully I had decided to pack a black bra with my strapless nude one.  Those two items will always be in my bag from now on.  As I=ve mentioned many times before, you have to roll with the punches.  That's what everyone did, and we pulled off a successful show.

Photo by Cher/Musico Roots
www.facebook.com/musicoroots.creative

We all changed into pin-up dresses as the movie got started.  I didn't have a real pin-up dress, but my gothic lolita jumper skirt was a nice substitute (it feels like sacrilege, but hey, I'm a fashion rebel).  Instead of watching the film, I wound up hanging with the dancers and their friends and partners.  I figured it was better to get to know people even if I saw some of them on a weekly basis.  There would be other chances for me to see the movie, and I knew that I'd go into awkward turtle mode when the rest of the crowd came out for the after-party.

I never do well with large crowds and starting/joining conversations.  Or photoshoots for that matter.  Thanks to Cher Musico though, I did make my way into the pre-show cast photo.  Eventually I wound up ducking into the dressing room because I needed to clear my head and grab my coat.  Also my partner, who had to work, wanted to know where to pick me up.  Of course, the post-after party (in Japan, this would be known as the "nijikai") plan was to hit up Velvet Taco.  It was an nice little finale to cap off a great night.

Photo by Doc Strange
seligfilmnews.com

A week later, I got to attend a workshop by Jodi Waseca, also known Oleeander Moon from the Hubba Hubba Revue, on fusing burlesque with belly dance.  Even though I had not been belly dancing on a regular basis for a couple of years now, I was curious as to how the line between to two could be blurred— especially when extreme strong ideas about how they should be distinct were instill in me… and probably every other beginner belly dancer.  The truth is, however, that belly dance came to the U.S. around the time burlesque did so the similarities cannot be denied.  Jodi focused on the burlesque as it was back then: tongue-in-cheek satire.  She used her "Dance of the Seven Failz" routine as an example, as it pokes fun at the mishaps that can happen in a performance.  At the same time, she did not deny that both dances can be flirtatious and sensual.  The message that I took home was theatricality.

Although belly dance is an important part of my dance career, I don't know if I'll ever incorporate it into my burlesque acts, aside from utilizing moves that span the genres.  I'm okay with others doing it, but at this point, I would feel like I was disrespecting my former teachers.  Plus there's a lot of cultural weight that I am not prepared to bear despite belly dance having evolved into something different from traditional Middle Eastern dance.  Nevertheless, I really loved Jodi's fan dance-belly dance fusion from the performance that came after the workshop, and the potential for cross-talk is very exciting.

More Than Just Stripping

Now that I've filmed my routine (it got moved to last Wednesday because of Thanksgiving), I can resume blogging.  How many times have you used the qualifier "more than just stripping" when talking about burlesque?  I know I have, and while I mean no insult to my stripper sisters, burlesque does have a history that involves zero clothes being shed.  Last month I got to be part of a variety show that evoked the old time burlesque performances that had comedy, music, and sideshow acts along with the striptease.

Oops the Clown and The Famous Mr. Cheeze
By Josh B.

Because I work in a lab with early birds, I generally avoid burlesque shows that are on Sundays through Thursdays.  I've come to realized that I'm missing future opportunities and have decided to make exceptions. The first was "Look What I Can Do Variety Hour", which was presented in partnership with Clever Girl Cabaret.  In addition to wanting to stage kitten for the lovely ladies of Clever Girl and to see a different side of burlesque, I saw that the cast included a cute little dog named Mr. Cheeze. How could I resist?

Black Mariah told me to go circus for my outfit. At first I wasn't sure I had anything, but I started throwing together pieces from my closet.  I wound up using the bra i made for the pride parade, these whimsical shorts I bought in Taiwan that have been the subject of many butt shots, striped tights, and a mini top hat. It definitely was not practical for the cold front that had moved in, but stripper life isn't always glamorous. . . or comfortable.

One of the aforementioned butt shots
By Josh B.

The folks from Look What I Can Do were extremely friendly and helpful.  Ooops the Clown and Kitty Kaos actually wrote out a setlist (when we couldn't find a spare copy) and marked when they would need me to pick up. I was also impressed by their ability to adapt to many unexpected variables. When you have a tiny animal and audience volunteers, you need to be able to think quickly on your feet.  It's something I've talked about before, and I discovered that there's definite room for improvement.  Mr. Cheeze was just way too fast.

Ratty Scurvics doing curtain call
Photo by Josh B.

"Look What I Can Do Variety Hour" was a huge hit because everyone was over-the-top and had the crowd enthralled.  Since my classes focus a lot on choreography and technique, I've been trying to approach burlesque from a theatre perspective. Despite doing drama in college, acting is one of my weaker points, and I started to worry about that aspect of my solo routine.

Fortunately the Ruby Room held a workshop by Paco Fish that tackled character development and expressing emotions. It was just what I needed. Even though the exercises seemed simple, they managed to convey all the things I learned in theatre classes and doing plays in a way that made so much more sense to me. I needed something more tangible than thinking sad or happy thoughts for the emotion to come across on my face. Paco gave me a whole new way to view theatre, and it helped me approach my routine in a different light. I'm still working on making my facial expressions and gestures bigger, but I think the emotions translate across my face and body a lot better now. I'm also thinking that his workshop will also be useful in conveying emotions on paper when I get back in the habit of writing fiction again (which I plan on doing as I take a breather).

Workshops and Pride

When the Dallas School of Burlesque opened in May, I was eager to check out the classes.  I still wanted to study at the Ruby Room, but it was time to expand my repertoire with the different styles DSB offered.  Plus it’s nice to get a different perspective on old bump and grind moves.

Over the summer, DSB offered two workshops: chair dance with Stephan and tassel twirling with Black Mariah.  In my many years of dance classes, I’d never had a male teacher until Stephan, the Southern Fried King of Burlesque.  He had a very free-spirited approach, which was just what I needed.  I’d been spending so much time focusing on being sexy, and I’ve always been a counter.  Both were holding me back, and I was happy to work on improvising and just feeling the music.  I could use some work on strength and flexibility, but I still learned a few chair tricks for a future routine.

my first pair of assels and tassles
made by Black Mariah

Tassel twirling was something I’ve always thought was cool even before I knew that they were part of burlesque.  I went into Black Mariah’s class a little bit cocky.  All that shimmying I did in Ginger Valentine’s classes must account for something, right?  Well, it turned out that my technique could use some work.  I had also placed the tassels too low at first, but I was also trying too hard to make my boobs move.  Ironically I discovered that I was better at shimmying with my arms held straight up, which is a more difficult position than with your arms held out.  As with hula and belly dance, I always seem to master a harder move before getting the basics down.  Black Mariah also taught us how to twirl assels, which was equally challenging and fun.

During the latter half of the summer, I started to wonder if I was rushing into things too quickly.  My double weekend of shows with the Ruby Revue and Lemme Addams’ Stardust Revue wore me out.  I also didn’t want to come on too strongly in my eagerness to stage kitten.  As a result, I decided to take the time to focus on classes and figuring out who Hana Li is.

Bellilona Fatin, me, Carmen St. Cloud, and Raven
By Lecroix Photography
www.facebook.com/lecroixphotography

That didn’t mean I wasn’t involved in other community activities.  When I learned that the Dallas School of Burlesque was invited to march in the Alan Ross Texas Freedom Parade, I knew had to participate.  I’d never been to a pride parade, and I really wanted to show my. . . well, pride in being queer and my support.  What better way than to march with friends in fabulous showgirl costumes?  The Dirty Blonde made costuming really easy for those of us who were busy.  We just had to pick a color of a rainbow, get a swimsuit (or in my case, a bra) the color of the rainbow, and embellish.  I picked red because I already had bottoms of that color from my Wonder Girl costume (and because it’s a common bra color).  However, I wanted to wear my socks that are the colors of the asexual pride flag: black, grey, white, and purple.  With some advice from Lily Lecroix and fringe from Black Mariah, I was able to add a bit of purple to my bra.  I also learned how to rhinestone.

Through both the costuming sessions and the parade itself, I got to know more members of the burlesque community.  It was hot and a long walk, but the energy and enthusiasm was unbelievable.  My only regret came from my feet, which did not like the long walk in my gold wedge sneakers.  Still, that was nothing compared to Jade Vivian and MayMay walking in real heels.  They definitely get my admiration.  Pride was a nice way to end the summer, and I even got a stage kittening gig out of it.  That’s a story for another post.  In the meantime, you can check out more photos over on my facebook page.

By Susan Migdol, EDGE Dallas
edgedallas.com

My Ecdysiastic Enterprise

Originally published January 14, 2013 on Dieselpunks After Dark

My resolution for this year is to be naked more.  While much of that relates to self-confidence and body image, it also has to do with burlesque.  I started out as a fan, but now I want to give back to the community and also inspire others the way the dancers have inspired me to be bold and sassy.  I don’t expect to be a performer by the end of the year, but I am interested to see where this journey takes me and I welcome you along for the ride.

The first time I saw burlesque, I was vacationing in Seattle.  A friend invited me to a goth club, which was having a fetish night featuring The Gorlesque Girls.  I remember watching a curvaceous and elegant dancer do a routine to “Little Drop of Poison” by Tom Waits and wanting to be able to shed a corset and twirl tassels like her.  I wanted her confidence– to be able to strut in heels like I owned the room and bare my body despite not fitting mainstream media’s standards of beauty.

My first burlesque class happened on a whim.  I had been taking belly dance at Move Studio, and their newsletter mentioned that Ginger Valentine would be teaching her last bumps and grinds workout class at the studio, I decided to not let this opportunity slide.  It was a hell of a workout and the perfect segue to All-con the following week, where I got a taste of more classical burlesque and subsequently wanted more.

Then, I found that Ginger had relocated to the Ruby Room, which had a Groupon for classes.  Buying the Groupon eliminated any excuse I made up for not trying out burlesque again: too far away, too much of physical challenge, too sexual for me.  I’m glad I made myself go.  Burlesque classes didn’t just help me get in shape; they made me more confident.  Yeah, that’s a total cliché, but it’s true.

While the Ruby Room’s burlesque classes focus on the dancing, the studio decided to try something a little different for the holidays: Ginger Valentine’s Naughty and Nice Workshop.  In the span of two hours, Ginger and fellow Ruby Revue member Renee Holiday taught a handful of us a striptease routine to Joe Bonamassa’s “Santa Claus Is Back in Town”. 

It was the first time I had done any striptease or danced with a boa so I didn’t know what to expect.  The routine wasn’t too complicated, and I found that taking off clothing for a certain number of counts while making it look pretty was the biggest challenge.  Ginger and Renee created a fun atmosphere that we were all wanting more at the end of the workshop.  I was no exception.

Ginger had encouraged us to perform the routine for that special someone, and I jumped on that opportunity.  For the next couple weeks, I rehearsed and improvised when I couldn’t remember a move.  I haphazardly gathered up a costume and even bought pasties from Lemme Addams of Whiskey Tongue Burlesque.  The pasties were the final step.

After a couple run-throughs to make sure I didn’t forget anything over Christmas, I made my debut for my one-person audience.  I’ve danced for him before, but I’ve always felt awkward.  This time, despite the parts that could use improvement, I didn’t.  He loved the routine, and I was happy to have put my all into it.  That was when I realized burlesque is something I truly love studying and doing. 

Even if I end up not having more than one person in my audience, I’m still going to continue dancing, and I want to at least try to work up the courage to perform in front of more people.  In the meantime, I will just continue to be part of the community through this blog and my attendance at shows.  However, those pasties are begging to be worn again.